My drumstick (and what it has to do with your career)
Just to be clear, I'm talking about the drumstick you play drums with. Not the kind that comes from a chicken.
This one, to be exact.
Just to be clear, I'm talking about the drumstick you play drums with. Not the kind that comes from a chicken.
This one, to be exact.
It's from my days as a drummer more than a decade ago. I played in a rock/blues/punk band and even in a church band. And yes, I only found the one stick *shrug*.
I found it in a box with the things that I lugged from my parents' home to our new home, but what it symbolises is not unique as far as my life is concerned. I have SO many things from past interests and hobbies.
It's like a graveyard of past versions of me.
There's the crochet and knitting needles, microgreen-growing containers and Latin dance shoes.
There are the books from all of those courses I took and that mic that I used for that podcast I once had.
There are business cards and business plans.
There's the charcoal sticks and hockey sticks and that one drumstick.
The travel diaries and books in foreign languages.
For a long time, I thought this reflected something wrong with me.
I can't be taken seriously, I would say. I never finish anything. I'm unreliable. I change my mind too much. I can't seem to just pick one damn thing and stick to it.
So much so that I made sure that this "problem" didn't extend to my career choice. I'd let myself run wild with hobbies and side hustles, but if I made any changes with my career it had to be CERTAIN and FOREVER and SERIOUS!
(In fact, I think I went even wilder with my hobbies and side hustles because it was the only place I allowed myself to actually do so.)
I believed this so strongly that it stopped me from making the change in my career I'd wanted to for so long.
Until my coach asked me this question...
How old were you when you learned that this way of being was wrong?
Damn, son.
Not: how can we get you to focus and pick something and commit??!! (which is what I was asking her for help with)
But rather... how can we get you to fall in love with the way you naturally are?
The way you're passionate and curious. The way you love learning and trying new things. The way you love fusions and intersections and creating new things.
And for me, I probably learned that it was not the way to be when I was a tween. When I was younger it was celebrated that I excelled at different things from academics to sport to art. But at a certain age, this suddenly became my liability because I couldn't quite decide what I wanted to be When I Grow Up. This is the case for many of us as we learn that in order to be taken seriously, we need to narrow our focus and commit to a career path.
Funny side-story: when I was considering career options and was given a list of all the possibilities, I apparently saw 'undertaker' and thought "That sounds cool, I'll get to undertake a whole bunch of things." until my mom explained what an undertaker actually was LOL
Anyway...
We've all heard the quote being thrown around: "A jack of all trades is a Master of none"
But have you heard the extended version of this quote?
It goes: "A jack of all trades is a Master of none, but oftentimes better than a Master of one."
It was never meant to be something negative to be a Jack of All Trades. It was actually something to be celebrated, and in periods like the Renaissance it WAS - hence the term Renaissance person/soul to describe people with multiple interests and pursuits.
It meant that you have range, depth and diversity. That you're creative and multi-dimensional. Multi-talented and multi-passionate.
Now that's not to say that narrowing or specialising is always bad; it just happens to be that it's glorified as the only way to be in our culture. We end up thinking there's something wrong with us when we can't seem to (or don't want to) do that.
Emilie Wapnick, author of "How to be Everything" describes the 3 superpowers of what she calls "multipotentialites":
Idea synthesis: combining two or more fields and creating something new at the intersection
Rapid learning: willing to try new things; learning skills and knowledge that we take into the new area, knowing nothing is wasted
Adaptability: the ability to change and pivot as our times change and our lives change
I can attest to these superpowers, and the more I saw it that way rather than trying to fix some "problem" that never even existed, the happier (and more badass) I became in my career.
Now, instead of seeing these things from my past as a graveyard, I now see it as an incredible gallery. One that documents my aliveness and humanity.
So I hope this encourages you to do the same. The world needs you in all your beautiful complexity; don't let them squeeze you into a box you were never meant to fit into, whether that's in your career or any other aspect of your life. Create something that only you can.
So I'd love to know from you: when did YOU first learn that your natural way of being was wrong?
